So I went out with my cane again yesterday. I enjoyed it. It made me feel better. And then when I got home, I had nobody to share it with. Obviously there was my mother – she’d gone out with me, after all. But previously when I had done something like that, I would have told my friends with BIID – Marisol, Rachel, and Jewel. Even two weeks ago I would have still told Jewel, even though Marisol was ignoring me and Rachel had rejected me. When I got my cane, I told Jewel. I didn’t get a chance to tell her in a Skype call, but I sent her an email and she wrote back. That was nice.
Now there’s absolutely nobody. It’s like I’m isolated – in my own world with nobody to share my experiences with. But that’s not really got much to do with BIID, because at least the BIID is mostly under control. Compared to BIID, social isolation is nothing.